Another week in Division 2, and honestly, watching some of you lot throw darts is like watching a group of drunk toddlers try to thread a needle during an earthquake. We had 16 matches this week, and if the quality of play was any lower, the board would have been safer if you’d just thrown the darts at each other instead. Let’s talk about "Mr t," the man of the hour—or rather, the man of the entire bloody league. He played more games than a caffeine-addled rabbit on a bender. He spent the week absolutely terrorizing the bottom feeders, racking up walkovers that were less of a "match" and more of a public shaming. If you managed to lose 7-0 to him, do us all a favour and take up a sport that doesn't involve sharp objects, like competitive knitting or sitting in a dark room until you learn how to hit a treble. Speaking of abysmal, let’s pour one out for kevinseanmills25. Kev, darling, an average in the 40s? I’ve seen better darts thrown by a stiff breeze in a pub car park. You lost to Craig Blair, who somehow managed to scrape a 46.91 average—which is the "highest of the week." Craig, congrats on being the king of the bin-fire. You’re the tallest dwarf in the circus, mate. Don't let it go to your head. Rhys Douglas actually managed to find a 180, which is frankly a miracle given the surroundings. I’d praise you, Rhys, but I know it was probably a total accident and you spent the next five minutes trying to figure out which end of the dart to hold. And to the rest of you who couldn't even be bothered to record an average above 0—congrats on the "invisible player" award. Truly, your ability to be consistently useless is the only thing keeping this league in business. **Player of the Week:** Mr t. Not because he’s good—his average was a tragic 43.58—but because he clearly has no social life and the stamina to beat every other mug in this division into submission. **Choker of the Week:** Everyone who lost 7-0 to a guy averaging mid-40s. You didn't just lose; you surrendered your dignity, your pride, and probably your right to call yourself a darts player. Sort it out. If I see another performance like this next week, I’m personally coming down there to confiscate your flights and replace them with wet paper napkins. Pull your fingers out, find the treble bed, and try to make the scoreboard look like a professional competition rather than a toddler’s tantrum. See you on the oche, try not to poke your own eyes out.